Lots of things have happened since my last blog, my mother Mary passed away on April 10, 2012 and my daddy Haskell passed away on January 21, 2013. Such a sad time for our family. Two of the greatest people in my life, and in the lives of my children and grandchildren. They both gave and gave so much of themselves ....I'm ashamed that I didn't do or give more to them. Life will never be the same for me. I grieve them almost every day. I miss and wish I could talk to them or ask them things that I don't know the answer to. People say "Life goes on" ....HOW?
A Space to Place My Heart
Tuesday, April 16, 2013
Thursday, February 02, 2012
Lots of changes since my last blogging....I thought I'd never see my sweet Isaac again. But God has blessed me so much....Isaac is back and I have a new Grand-daughter who is 4 months old. I am back in Mount Airy ..."Mayberry"! I am presently looking for a permanent place to lay my head. My husband is finished with school and is working ....life is full. I have regrets ...some to say the least but hey, who doesn't? I ramble quite a bit ...have lots to say but can't say it sometimes. But I'll be back ....PROMISE!!
Friday, June 17, 2011
I can't even begin to describe how I felt at that moment. It is almost "wordless". I really felt this would be good-bye for forever. My heart was aching and my eyes were flooded and he knew it. He was so sweet with all the hugs and kisses I could handle. He kissed me and his Papa about 50 times. He knew this might be the last time he'd see us. I love this child more than words can pen. I love his smile, his eyes, his lips, his hugs, his sweet voice, his heart and all the love he gives me. I can't get enough of him. I pray that God will help us watch over him and guide him in any things he does through out his life. God hold him in your arms, as mine aren't strong enough.
Thursday, August 05, 2010
What a weekend!!!
I got to see these lovely two faces....thank you Lord. I have missed them both so bad.
It was wonderful to see them and touch them....hug them....love them. He is a real ham.
He would say "Cheese"....and smile. WOW!!!
Isaac....my darling grandson. You show the grace that each of us need to know. You, as a child, with your forgiving and loving heart, bring me such joy. I can't describe how much love I feel for you. Your sweet smile gives me such pleasure, whether it's just a chance meeting that I see you; or if I'm allowed to visit with you. Your love will carry me for the rest of my days. Isaac, for I know that your heart is in sync with mine.....just look at the Moon and you will know that I am thinking of you today, and always. Mucho Love Isaac James Torres.....Mucho Love. <3
Sunday, July 25, 2010
HOME....no place like it. If you've never experienced this place, you need to. Home can be anywhere you want it to be. As long as you're happy... it can even be in Chapel Hill, NC. But your heart has to be right and I know mine is. I'm so happy with my walk with God...No I'm not perfect but my love for Christ is. He helps me in my everyday walk with him. He even carries me sometimes. WOW huh? You know, he's held my hand so many times when indeed I needed it and gave me guidance thru his word. I'm so undeserving of Him. I thank you Lord for saving me.
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
Location:Mt Airy, NC
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
Nobody Understands...Nobody. I don't expect them to either. I could sleep for days....and days. I am sick. I know this is why. I hate this feeling, but there is no getting over it. It's literally killing me. I'm sad. I'm so, so sad. I can't get out of this state either. I don't think I want to either....as long as this continues. If death is bad, I don't think I'll survive it either. I can't talk to anyone much because they just don't know what I feel. I don't expect them to. I don't want anyone analyzing me on this. If you've been there, then you know. Don't try to analyze this. You can't. I have one true friend who is there for me.....who don't ask me why I feel this way....who just listens to me rant and cry. That friend loves me. But who wants to listen to this all the time? This is why I don't tell this friend when I feel this way....I don't want them to hear it all the time!!! Who Would? I don't think my own family knows either. I don't bombard them with the details of my feelings. If I do, some are quick to judge me....not love me....and they don't listen. I don't need a judge....I don't need my family to tell me how to feel....I need them to understand and love me. How about a little love instead of knowing what to tell me to do? You don't know....you can't ....you're not there!!!! I am!!!! It's hard to be in the middle....try it a while....be in the middle and see how you feel. You might not be so quick to judge my feelings!!! I could rant on and on.....Just love me.....don't try to start something with me. I cry.......who cares?!?
Saturday, April 10, 2010
This was a fun day. We decided to go to the NC Botanical Gardens in Chapel Hill, NC. It's only about 1/4 of a mile down the road from where we currently live. But an interesting thing was the big Chess Game board with all the metal characters. We started to play a game....mostly for show, but none the less it was fun. Shane is big on games anyway....and he loves Chess. I am not a good player. I used to love it but over the years I've not had time to do that. Too many other things to do like take care of children and cook plus work. No time for play. It was a fun moment and a great memory. Thanks Shane.
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
It's Wednesday, and it's the day that the Lord hath made. I will rejoice and be glad in it. That is God's commandment for me today. I awoke at 5:00am today, thought about life without the sunshine. I watched as the sun arose in the sky and thought about all the blessings he has given me. I am thankful that I had 2 parents who loved me and that God has put all the people in my life who are supposed to be there. I am trying to look forward and not look back. So let the sunshine in....and be warm in the graces of his great LOVE.
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
Life in Chapel Hill is complex. I can't tell you how much....just have to experience it.
That seems so small when looking up. I saw this beautiful moon while going to a
East Chapel Hill High School Soccer meeting for Lindsay. I love looking up to the sky
talking to the Lord...most of the time, crying to the Lord. But none the less looking up
and seeing what all God has made. I am so in awe at the works his hands have created.
He made this Moon just for me. So I can look up and see his work. Don't forget the
beautiful tree top....oh how beautiful. Thank you Lord for the Moon, Sky, Tree Top, Eyes, but
most of all Lord, thank you for bestowing upon my life all your wonderful blessings.